A while ago some individual came on my blog here and posted some listing for viagra and other things in this huge post, which obviously had no place here on my blog. Course it was also done annonymously which cut off my addressing them directly. So, I thought I would do a post and thank the person for being so massively disrespectfull of my space here in blog world.
What you have done for me, in your disrespect of other people's space, time and effort is taught me to not be angry at the blatant disrespect you have shown my blog. I'm sure you have plastered nonsense like this on other people's blogs by posting your advertisements for viagra and other sites which are, a. not welcome and b. not relevant c. disrespectfull, however what I've gained due to your disgusting and blatant disregard for my personal space here on the net, is to simply adjust the blog so that I can review any posts that are made.
While this may seem like something extra to do and would appear to cause most some type of anger or frustration that they have to do this. YOU dear person have caused me to be reminded, consistently, every time you post some ridiculous ad on my site, that I should be posting here more often. It is a nice reminder to come, post and share things on my blog which I have sorely neglected for quite some time now.
So, I want to thank you for being the disrespectfull curr that you are and thank you for reminding me what's important. Most importantly you have reminded me not to react in a negative fashion or out of anger but to follow through with a solution and let it slide off instead of being angry due to your disrespect and obvious lack of courtesy for others.
So, I want to thank you again for posting unwanted advertisements on my blog and for giving me the opportunity to grow more as a person.
Have a wonderful holiday :)
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Monday, December 21, 2009
Don't Feed Into A Problem... Focus on Positive Resolution
I distinctly remember a time where I was upset about something. I told the person who was around me at the time, how I felt and that I was very upset... I was instantly angered by something I had been told because I thought that I was promised something important and now, the other person was going to back out of their promise.
Based on same or similar situations in the past, instead of being calm in that moment, saying to myself, Okay, Okay... just wait and see, talk it through with the person. I was, on a scale of 1-10 anger wise, a 20.
I knew I needed to vent, because I may find myself handling something badly if I allowed this feeling to go any further. So, I vented to this individual... I just needed to get it off my chest.
Now, what they did, wasn't just listen or appreciate my situation, most may not be good at that anyway... however this individual chose to take this "opportunity" to feed into my already high level of feelings on the matter by telling me stories about the things this person who made me the promise had done "for someone else"... Which would have been in direct contradiction, keeping their promise to someone else, and not me.
You can imagine how much damage this type of behavior can cause to an already tense situation. I can only imaging how that would have affected the situation few years ago.
A few years ago, I would have allowed this person's stories to sit with me, to create more frustration, betrayal and anger. Just sitting there hearing it, would have made my head spin with all of these irrational thoughts about this individual.
Had I allowed this to happen, picture what would have happened in my conversation with the other person when I did finally see them or respond to them.
It would have been explosive, the ramifications of "my actions" in feeling slighted in this way would have truly messed up a budding relationship between myself and this other individual.
All I kept hearing my mind say was... "How is this relevant to my situation?"
Fortunately for me, I took the high road. I addressed the situation calmly and was specific as to a prior conversation that had taken place, and advised them that they were mistaken.
Guess what happened? The party, that I was upset with acknowledged what I said, and followed through.
Imagine had I allowed the other person's stories and words to color my experience? It wouldn't have worked out well and the foundation in the relationship I was building with the initial person who I was upset with, would have been heavily cracked.
You have to pay attention to other people's motives when they share in your stories.
You need to separate and divide these things "for yourself" and take things from a higher perspective.
Reason and thinking things through can help you greatly.
In the future too, I would strongly suggest trying not to discuss issues with the person who was feeding into it negatively.
If they do hear it, you need to address it and ask them directly why they would feed into something, which already has the potential to blow up in everyone's face as it is.
Watch the excuses flow folks...
Don't buy into what other's say, learn to think for yourself and create relationships with others on your terms, in a healthy and communicative way.
Stop.
Think.
Address.
Don't asssume the worst in someone else because a situation is same or similar. Do, know what you know, understand you'll have these times where same or similar situations trigger a strong response from you.
Learn how to talk yourself down from that place. Learn WHO you can talk to about these things so it's not enhanced by someone else's "stuff". Then address it with the person directly, in a calm and rational manner. You react badly, they'll react badly. It's just that simple.
Difficult to process at the time perhaps, but the high road, in the end, makes for more trust in a relationship and opens the door for more understanding in the future.
If, that's what you want. If you want to walk around bitter and feeling like the poor mistreated? Have it at... I chose not to.
Based on same or similar situations in the past, instead of being calm in that moment, saying to myself, Okay, Okay... just wait and see, talk it through with the person. I was, on a scale of 1-10 anger wise, a 20.
I knew I needed to vent, because I may find myself handling something badly if I allowed this feeling to go any further. So, I vented to this individual... I just needed to get it off my chest.
Now, what they did, wasn't just listen or appreciate my situation, most may not be good at that anyway... however this individual chose to take this "opportunity" to feed into my already high level of feelings on the matter by telling me stories about the things this person who made me the promise had done "for someone else"... Which would have been in direct contradiction, keeping their promise to someone else, and not me.
You can imagine how much damage this type of behavior can cause to an already tense situation. I can only imaging how that would have affected the situation few years ago.
A few years ago, I would have allowed this person's stories to sit with me, to create more frustration, betrayal and anger. Just sitting there hearing it, would have made my head spin with all of these irrational thoughts about this individual.
Had I allowed this to happen, picture what would have happened in my conversation with the other person when I did finally see them or respond to them.
It would have been explosive, the ramifications of "my actions" in feeling slighted in this way would have truly messed up a budding relationship between myself and this other individual.
All I kept hearing my mind say was... "How is this relevant to my situation?"
Fortunately for me, I took the high road. I addressed the situation calmly and was specific as to a prior conversation that had taken place, and advised them that they were mistaken.
Guess what happened? The party, that I was upset with acknowledged what I said, and followed through.
Imagine had I allowed the other person's stories and words to color my experience? It wouldn't have worked out well and the foundation in the relationship I was building with the initial person who I was upset with, would have been heavily cracked.
You have to pay attention to other people's motives when they share in your stories.
You need to separate and divide these things "for yourself" and take things from a higher perspective.
Reason and thinking things through can help you greatly.
In the future too, I would strongly suggest trying not to discuss issues with the person who was feeding into it negatively.
If they do hear it, you need to address it and ask them directly why they would feed into something, which already has the potential to blow up in everyone's face as it is.
Watch the excuses flow folks...
Don't buy into what other's say, learn to think for yourself and create relationships with others on your terms, in a healthy and communicative way.
Stop.
Think.
Address.
Don't asssume the worst in someone else because a situation is same or similar. Do, know what you know, understand you'll have these times where same or similar situations trigger a strong response from you.
Learn how to talk yourself down from that place. Learn WHO you can talk to about these things so it's not enhanced by someone else's "stuff". Then address it with the person directly, in a calm and rational manner. You react badly, they'll react badly. It's just that simple.
Difficult to process at the time perhaps, but the high road, in the end, makes for more trust in a relationship and opens the door for more understanding in the future.
If, that's what you want. If you want to walk around bitter and feeling like the poor mistreated? Have it at... I chose not to.
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